bitchy

On Monday, I covered the weekend melodramas over Prince Harry’s fictitious desire to become a working royal once again. As I said, you have to keep several things in mind for all of these “Harry should come back/Harry can never be allowed to be a working royal again” stories. One, the sources are never actually in the Sussexes’ camp, it’s almost always coming out of Kensington Palace or Buckingham Palace’s rage-briefings or WhatsApps. Two, the Windsors quite genuinely believe that all charitable work falls under the umbrella of “royal work.” Thus, when Harry does events with his private patronages in the UK, they believe that he’s doing “royal work,” which is “not allowed” per the Sandringham Summit. Three, for years, the Windsors have conflated Harry’s words about wanting familial reconciliation to mean “he wants to come back and live in the UK.” All of that played out in a series of hilariously ragebaity briefings and Mail exclusives over the weekend.

So, once again, for the millionth time: Harry lives in California. He’s happy there, he’s raising his kids in America, he enjoys working and protecting his peace and not being assaulted by his brother. Concurrently, he would also like to spend more time with his father in what sounds like Charles’s final year(s), and he would like to feel safe enough to bring his wife and children over TO VISIT. Harry would also like to continue working with various British charities. That’s it. That’s the extent of it. But these delusional bitches are still writing feverish columns about how Harry absolutely SHOULD come back to be a “working royal.” Like this piece from Celia Walden at the Telegraph – an excerpt:

Reconciliations can be multi-tiered, however, and in the case of King Charles III’s long-awaited reconciliation with his youngest son after 19 months apart, I think everyone with any ounce of compassion will have been hoping that the Sept 10 meeting was just the start of a deeper rapprochement. What people might not have been expecting, however – and only emerged on Sunday – is that some of those 54 minutes were used to discuss a new role for Prince Harry within The Firm.

According to The Mail on Sunday, who cited “sources apparently close to the Duke of Sussex”, the meeting not only signalled a “thawing of their relationship” and the “acceptance” of his family “back into the royal fold”, but the start of a new working model for the ex-royal, who apparently now plans to return to the UK “four or five times a year” for “public events”.

The suggestion that this kind of formal, but informal, role might work was immediately rebutted by Palace sources yesterday, who told The Telegraph: “The King has been absolutely clear in upholding his late mother’s decision that there can be no ‘half-in, half-out’ public role for members of the family.” And my reaction surprised me.

Why can’t Harry be allowed to be a half-in, half-out royal? That’s essentially what he is now, given no one has taken his title away, and he conducts faux royal tours to the likes of Nigeria and Columbia on a whim. When you consider the kind of gaffes The Sussexes are prone to if left to their own devices (Harry’s US visa and admissions of past drug use, being just one example), wouldn’t it also simply be safer for the Palace to have a little involvement in where he goes and who he sees?

Harry also still does a substantial amount of high-profile charity work, as we know – with the HALO Trust, Sentebale, the Invictus Games and his Archewell projects – and whatever you think of his behaviour over the past five years, he has always been incredibly good at the kind of interactions charity work necessitates. Like his mother before him, he tends to be warm and natural in even the most stilted situations. If those talents could be harnessed and used to the Royal family’s advantage, why not?

While one can’t but admire the late Queen Elizabeth’s extraordinary work ethic and discipline, there is also a reality to consider. As time goes on, younger members of The Firm are likely to want to work less than their elders. If this enrages you, remember that they would only be following the same trajectory as the rest of their generation, and, indeed, the rest of the country. Denying them that possibility, now that Megxit has made having your cake and eating it a possibility, is a risk, isn’t it? Whereas allowing (if not embracing) a more part-time model, might just help with The Firm’s long-term survival.

If there is any truth to these rumours of a new role for the Prince within The Firm, however, and if it does turn out to be something father and son actively want, there would have to be a final blab warning in the contract. Not the small print, but bolded-up in font size 72, please. “If a single more word about the inner workings of this Firm makes its way onto Oprah’s airwaves, into a Netflix special or a bestselling follow-up memoir, you’re out.”

[From The Telegraph]

It’s been five years and nine months of this sh-t, this back and forth debate about whether the institution made the right call by denying Harry and Meghan’s “half in” offer. I don’t even believe it was QEII’s decision – QEII’s courtiers, then-Prince Charles and Prince William all made the call to reject the half-in offer. Their decision has been catastrophic, and we’ve watched the blowback on the institution unfold in real time. What’s even funnier is watching how few people can even admit how badly the Windsors f–ked up. The Sussexit was THE thing, it was the real beginning of the end. And I hope everyone knows by now that the whole reason why “half in” was rejected was because they thought Harry would eventually come crawling back home, broke and divorced. That was the big plan. And since they didn’t get the result they wanted, now they’re like “oh wait maybe we should LET him come back, but only if he begs, only if he admits he was wrong!” Abandonment Issues Isle.

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Backgrid.