Wife

Lady Anne Glenconner was lady-in-waiting to Princess Margaret, and she was close with many of that generation of royals and aristocrats. Lady Anne married Baron Glenconner, who violently abused her throughout their decades-long marriage, then disinherited her in his will. This explains why Lady Anne has fashioned a late-in-life career for herself as a memoirist, novelist and royal commentator – she simply needs the money. A few years ago, she claimed that John Kerry told her that all Americans “feel very sorry for Prince Harry,” a claim which was later disputed by the Biden-era State Department. Well, Lady Anne’s latest book is Manners and Mischief, and she gets into more personal stories which I guess she left out of her bestselling memoir. Stories about… Princess Diana and the Spencer family. And one judgement about the Windsors. As excerpted by the Mail:

QEII should have worked harder to find Charles a bride: I do slightly feel that the late Queen Elizabeth could have worked harder to try to find Prince Charles a suitable wife. The queens of Greece and Spain used to entertain royal princesses from other European countries in order to find a wife for their sons, but I think because the Queen had fallen in love and had such a successful marriage to Prince Philip, she wasn’t really focused on Prince Charles in the same way.

The grandmothers were happy though: The Queen Mother and Lady Fermoy [Diana’s maternal grandmother] were keen that the marriage to Diana should happen. I have a letter the Queen Mother wrote to my mother expressing her delight at the proposed marriage. Prince Philip was also very much in favour of the union, and, of course, Prince Charles needed to marry a virgin which Diana appeared to be.

Diana’s youth & popularity: She was so young when they married and had very little life experience. And I think when she became so incredibly popular with the public, it was very hard for Prince Charles. I had a certain sympathy for him when he was asked if he was in love with Diana during their engagement interview and he said: ‘Whatever in love means’. I think love is complicated.

Nanny troubles: My sister said that Diana had a rather tenuous grasp on the truth, and I wonder whether it was the result of being brought up in such an unhappy household. Years later, when Diana was pregnant with William and looking for a nanny, Princess Margaret suggested she employ our wonderful nanny Barbara Barnes. Barbara went for the interview but didn’t hear anything back. It fell to me to follow up with Diana’s household and when I called, I was told: ‘Oh, yes she’s got the job,’ though no one had bothered to let Barbara know. Eventually, though, Diana became jealous of how fond William and Harry were of Barbara and she got rid of her.

Diana was still gracious to this awful woman: I was extremely touched by the letter Diana wrote to me after my son Henry died [from Aids, aged 29 in 1990]. She had met him while visiting patients at St Mary’s Hospital in Paddington. She wrote that she was very struck by Henry’s inner strength and emphasised how he had given her a greater understanding of how to cope with Aids. At a time when most people couldn’t even talk about Aids, Diana’s directness about the illness and appreciation of Henry was very comforting and meant a great deal to me.

[From The Daily Mail]

It’s true that Diana and Charles’s grandmothers were involved in their courtship, and they believed it was a smart match because of Diana’s youth and inexperience, but also because of Diana’s aristocratic background. I don’t think the grandmothers really understood that Diana was so modern and so different from most aristocrats of the era. As for the idea of QEII doing more to introduce Charles to suitable young women… in some sense, Lady Anne is correct, and QEII should have taken more of an interest considering Charles was the heir and the monarchy’s future hinged on his choice of bride. But I’m sure QEII’s perspective was that Prince Philip, the Queen Mum and Lord Mountbatten had it covered.

What’s also fascinating is that Charles, in turn, took a hands-off approach to his sons and their paths towards finding their brides. Charles didn’t do it consciously, he’s just so negligent and self-absorbed, I’m not sure it would have occurred to him that he should have done more to throw eligible, well-heeled aristocratic women in his sons’ paths. It’s also worth noting that those well-heeled aristo girls wanted absolutely nothing to do with William. Those girls and their parents saw the way that family destroyed Diana. Still, you’d think that Charles would have stepped in when the Middletons were making their moves. Alas, he did not.

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Cover Images.