The way the app works is that it gives women control over making the first move, which Trombetti says can help make them feel less vulnerable than in the traditional app setup where either party can initiate a connection. Once you’ve matched with someone, you have 24 hours to talk or your connection expires. This urgency puts the onus on the woman to reach out and get outside of their comfort zone. It’s a low-stakes app, says Heather Dugan, a relationship expert, keynote speaker, and award-winning author of Date Like a Grownup: Anecdotes, Admissions of Guilt, & Advice Between Friends. “Bumble is easy entry—answer a few short, pithy answers, and you’re in. I generally suggest it to first-timers as a ‘get your toes in the water’ option.” One of the most unique aspects is that the service extends beyond fostering romance—you can use Bumble for Friends to expand your social circle or Bumble Bizz to make professional contacts.
Other dating sites for people over 50 to consider
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“OurTime only focuses on singles over 50, so you won’t waste your time scrolling through non-age-appropriate dating profiles, nor be hounded by a youngster,” says Wendy Walsh, PhD, a relationship expert at DatingAdvice.com and psychology professor. The service is part of the group that also owns Match, Hinge, and OkCupid, and if you opt in, you’ll see matches from the entire network of sites. The site says it has more than 9 million visitors per month—a giant number to choose from, should you feel like you’re running out of options on other sites. Its survey has only a few questions to answer, and you can search for matches based on criteria (including “deal-breakers” like whether they have children) or let the site recommend partners.
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Though Hinge’s dating pool is largely millennial and Gen Z (over 30% of users are between 21 and 34), it can still be a strong option for daters over 50 who want engaging conversations and are open to meeting slightly younger partners. “Right now Hinge has been quite fruitful for my clients in their 50s and 60s,” says online dating and relationship coach Megan Weks. “One of my male clients in his 60s wasn’t compelled to try it because he felt the cohort was younger, but he met a woman in her mid-50s who he is now dating.”
Hinge also appeals to those seeking more substance than hookup-focused apps. “It is a great cost-effective option for casual dating since they have a free option,” Nashira Kayode, PhD, LCSW, a licensed therapist in Eastvale, California, previously told Glamour. “But Hinge is also viewed as more serious than other apps that are known for hookups, so the pressure to meet in person quickly is less likely.” Connections are made when you like or comment on a specific element of a profile, such as a photo. This author has used it for years because of how straightforward and rewarding its free version is: I enjoy its creative fill-in prompts (“A recent shower thought I had” and “Two truths and a lie,” to name a couple), conversation starters, and its voice-memo feature—the latter is so helpful as a way to read someone’s tone, and its convo starters give me ways to get to know someone beyond their profile and pictures.
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“OkCupid is best for people who are looking for diversity and inclusivity, as it caters to different sexual orientations, gender identities, and relationship styles,” LeMeita Smith, PhD, director of clinical services at United Health Services, says. In 2013, it was the first dating platform to introduce 22 gender and 13 orientation choices (a big difference from competitor sites who largely offer binary options). OkCupid is known for its large user base (over 50,000 dates are made every week, per the site), detailed quiz, and matching like-minded people.
“Through OkCupid’s questionnaire, I could filter by my deal-breakers—from big-picture things like religion, kids, marriage, monogamy—to more granular compatibility stuff, like feelings on jealousy, sleeping routines, and political issues,” Glamour reviewer Tasneem Anjarwalla previously said. “What’s more, I could then rank how important those things were to me, and how important I wanted them to be for the other person. The questions felt like fun BuzzFeed quizzes, and the more I answered, the more I saw the algorithm suggesting potential partners that really felt like people I’d be into.” You do have to pay for OkCupid’s basic version in order to access unlimited likes, rewinds to do a double-take on someone you accidentally swiped past, and the ability to filter out deal-breakers. Upgrade to Premium if you want to see who’s liked you, to send three SuperLikes per week, and to view their answers to public questions.
