Peter

South Park returned Wednesday after a three-week hiatus and left us with the terrifying prospect of Eric Cartman being the only human to save us from the Antichrist.

For reasons unexplained, the episode is listed as season 28, episode one — not the sixth episode of the 27th season. Perhaps it’s a contract issue with Paramount and South Park Studios, but it doesn’t seem to have much to do with the plot, which carries on where it left off.

This week at South Park Elementary, the “6-7” meme is in full force and driving the parents and teachers mad. For the uninitiated, under-14s have been saying “6-7” when they don’t know the answer, as a fill-in phrase, or for reasons they and we will never know. The genesis of the meme comes from the song “Doot Doot,” by rapper Skrilla in December 2024, and for some reason, it just took off. Eventually, obsession over the joke drives Cartman to puke incessantly. Or is he possessed?

Meanwhile, tech guru Peter Thiel enters the story, plotting with J.D. Vance to thwart the birth of the Antichrist, i.e., Donald Trump and Satan’s baby. Thiel gets Trump to head to Planned Parenthood to try to sneakily ask a doctor to perform an abortion on Satan, but it is rebuffed by the doctor, who tells him that he’ll need someone with expertise on the Antichrist. Enter Thiel, who marches into South Park Elementary and lays down the law with the faculty about the possible cult the kids are obsessed over.

Back at the A-story, Cartman is at the doctor’s office, too, undergoing a full-body scan to determine the cause of his health crisis. But the puke keeps coming and it appears they will need to seek outside help.

Thiel, having commandeered the school’s security system, downloads all student data and begins to observe and report. Cameras across the school are watching the kids, as the staff is seeking to find more leads on what is going on with this “6-7” business.

Also added into the jam-packed episode is a plotline with Jesus trying to reconcile with modern Christianity and going on a double date with PC Principal; his date is a piece of work named Peggy Rockbottom. It doesn’t go well. Back at school, Thiel dubs Jesus a “Nosey Nancy” when he protests the surveillance and is quickly removed by PC Principal; in the gym, he laments the state of affairs with the sporty school leader, who asks him, point-blank, if he is gay.

Trump gags continue throughout the episode: if his sphincter isn’t on full display at Planned Parenthood, he is in bed with Satan, but rebuffed and masturbating… with chopsticks.

The plot thickens as Vance and Thiel’s partnership is revealed as a scheme to obtain all of the world’s data. But he must sort out this Antichrist business, so Thiel heads to the Cartman residence in a sharp homage to The Exorcist. Oh, and he got there in an Uber. It took him around six or seven minutes. After he spends time with Cartman, Thiel concludes that he may be the only hope we have to stop the Antichrist.

“We have to unlock the secrets he holds, no matter what it takes,” he declares. Uh-oh.

Back at the Cheesecake Factory, Jesus is back on a double date with Peggy Rockbottom and PC Principal, but just can’t take it, and the warped sense of Christianity that seems to have taken hold across America.

“You need to bully people and you’re using the Bible to do it, ” he tells PC Principal, as he tries to kick his ass. Jesus then heads out into the suburban sprawl and contemplates life on earth in 2025. He then turns around, walks into “the Factory,” stares down PC Principal and pulls Ms. Rockbottom out of her chair and back to his place. He’s going full bro.

The two-parter should conclude in two weeks.

Wednesday night’s episode is the sixth of the ratings-smashing 27th season of South Park, which debuted on Comedy Central in 1997. Additional new episodes of the latest season will air on Oct. 29, Nov. 12, Nov. 26 and Dec. 10, according to Comedy Central.